My Journey Towards a Dream
The Start of a Journey
Since I was little, I had aspirations on becoming a Software Engineer. I understood how technology did so much for people; how it changed and improved lives. I wanted to create code that benefited others, or work as a Software Engineer for a company that did great things. I made this goal for myself early on, and have spent my life working towards this goal. I took up coding as a hobby since I was in elementary school, and started off with Ruby. I can vividly recall the days when I stayed up all night on a school night, watching YouTube tutorials and reading articles online on code. Growing up, I have had my fair share of relatives telling me that this pursuit was a “waste of time” or that I should be thinking of pursuing other fields. I don’t blame my relatives in the slightest; the fact people told me I couldn’t do it encouraged me to keep working at it.
I took my first technical course in high school. None of the schools I have attended before had offered any technical courses, so I was elated to be in a school that offered a tech class. I took a Web Design class, and I loved it. I knew some basics already, but I still learned so much. I knew this was what I wanted to do for a living.
During the late years of high school, I was often grilled on what career path I would be pursuing. My answer never changed, no matter what the others said: “I want to be a software engineer.”
I was so determined to pursue my dreams that once I graduated high school, I went straight to a tech college. Only one month after my high school graduation, I went straight to a tech college to pursue a B.S. in Computer Science. Of course, not everyone was pleased with the news. I have had some friends tell me things such as, “Coding might be too difficult for someone like you.” I’ve had friends try to convince me that since it was a male-dominated field, I wouldn’t stand a chance. But I knew what I wanted to do.
“I want to be a software engineer.”
The Tempestuous Road Ahead
My years in college will always hold a special place in my memories. I have made trustworthy, kind, encouraging friends, who push me towards my dream, rather than try to deter me. But I have also met people in college who berated me, who told me I would never survive in the real world, and treated me like I was useless and helpless. Even people like this served as encouragement; no matter what people say, I will not stray from the goal ahead.
In the beginning of my college years, I was put in classes with people with much more experience with code and tech than me. I constantly worried about falling behind, so I did my best to keep studying and would not shy away from asking my peers and teachers for help. My school’s community was so encouraging; I never felt ashamed to ask for help or to admit I was struggling with a topic. Even if I struggled, I was determined to keep working until my weakness became my strength.
I have made several projects that I am proud of during my time at college. I greatly enjoyed working on team projects. I loved working together with a team with different strengths to create an amazing project. I loved helping out my team members with their code, and learning new things about them. Even the small projects I made while I was still a beginner are projects I’m still proud of to this day. They remind me of how much I have grown and learned. They remind me that if I were able to grow this much, I can keep growing and honing my skills.
A Difficult Experience
I have been actively seeking a Software Engineering role. I’ve been working hard on studying for tech interviews, making connections, and creating more portfolio projects. I have studied and took classes on both front end web and back end web so I could become a full stack developer. But my job search has not been a straight forward path.
When I first landed my first interview with company, I was ecstatic. I worked hard to prepare. I did mock interviews with a teacher every week, taking note of my weaknesses and how I could improve so I could ace that interview. But things did not turn out well at all.
I interviewed with a software engineer at the company through zoom. I had connected with him on LinkedIn beforehand, so I knew he had been working there for a long time. I was a bit nervous, considering it was my first interview. My assignment was to implement a feature in the sample code he had written. I turned on my camera, and after looking at me, he asked:
“Do you even have a code editor?”
I didn’t think much of it at the time, so I politely told him yes, and informed him of what I use. He didn’t seem too impressed, and told me to share my screen.
I agreed to share my screen so he could observe me. Right off the bat, he made snide remarks and criticized me about small things and details, like what computer I used, etc. It was difficult at first, as he’d always have some sarcastic remark or insult after anything I did. But I would not let his words get to me. I remained calm. I spoke politely and thoughtfully.
I actually found a bug in the sample code he gave me to work on. I was working on fixing it. However, he criticized me for trying to fix the bug in his sample project, insisting there was no bug. I tried to explain that the bug may affect the feature I was implementing, but he was rude about it. So I demonstrated what would happen if you ran the code. He brushed off my complaints, and tried to run it himself, and lo and behold, it did not work.
I explained to him that I could try debugging it myself, and he didn’t stop me. I read through his code to find where the bug was, and he remarked:
“Don’t they teach you this stuff at your school?”
I responded calmly. “Yes”, I said, and explained what I was doing.
He rolled his eyes and started typing.
“I found it in one google search. First result, too. Wow.” He said, sarcastically.
I did not let his jeers get to me. He gave me instructions on how to fix his code. Even though I was typing as he spoke, he’d get irritated and criticize every thing I did.
When the code he found “on the first result” didn’t work, he got frustrated and impatient. He started criticizing me more, asking if I messed anything up. I showed him that I did exactly as he said, but he didn’t want to hear it.
“You should know how to fix these things.” He told me.
Our interview ended. He told me the company would “keep in touch.”
Once the zoom call was ended, I was determined to complete this assignment anyway. At first, I felt there was no use, as I most likely botched the interview anyway. Even so, I was determined to finish my assignment. I remembered my dream:
“I want to be a software engineer.”
On my own, I fixed the bug and implemented the feature. I was proud of how it turned out.
I emailed the company about how I had finished the sample project…and I was ghosted. A few weeks later, I emailed the company again, and they sent me a rejection letter. But I wasn’t too upset. After the interview I had, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to work with someone like him.
I checked out the company’s reviews on Glassdoor on a whim. Apparently, the company had a lot of negative reviews from women. The company was described as a “boys’ club” and they mistreat a lot of their female co-workers. I feared that my gender could hinder my journey to achieving my dreams, but I didn’t want to stop there and give everything up.
Even though my first interview wasn’t the most pleasant, I have definitely learned from this experience, and this will certainly aid me later in life.
“I Want to be a Software Engineer.”
I applied for many other software engineer roles. I received plenty of rejection letters, but I did manage to land some interviews. I made it a habit to ask for feedback after receiving the rejection letter. Some companies didn’t respond, but the ones that did always had similar feedback.
“We’re looking for someone with a little more experience.”
I remember that I did get to the final stage of an interview for a software engineer internship, but I was rejected because I didn’t have enough experience. It was frustrating. How could I get my first job or internship if everyone wanted more work experience? How can I learn and gain experience if everyone seemingly wants someone who already has it?
I graduate in summer of this year, 2021. As my graduation date draws nearer, my determination to land a job heightens. I self-study new technologies and skills. I create new portfolio projects to demonstrate my understanding of these new skills. I update my resume frequently, reach out to hiring contacts and recruiters, and apply for jobs all over. My path may not be straight-forward, but I will not be deterred from my goal.
I will not let my gender, nor weaknesses hold me back from my dreams.
I will not let others bring me down.
I will not let the piling rejection letters cause me to stray from my path.
I am going to keep at it until I have landed my dream job as a software engineer, and I am extremely thankful for my friends, family, and staff members at my college who continue to encourage me.
